Scripted

i wish life were a tv show; it'd be a lot more predictable.
a lot easier to plan out. and i'd know for sure i'm the protagonist.

fear immobilizes and destroys.

Semana de los Muertos

it's winters like this that make me want to run away, fly away across the country again
it's weeks like this that make me want to freeze time or erase responsiblities for a while
it's days like this that make me want to only carry one emotion not to feel so overwhelmed with news and constant changing emotions
You loved me once, and that's all i need to remember. you really loved me. I will continue to love you, even if you're not here with me. I'll miss you, i wish i could've said goodbye.

la voyante

is it sick to think this is funny?
oh, lord, i love understanding human nature. i love being able to forsee the future.
deny, deny, deny; doesn't matter cuz i've already seen see see what you wish wasn't true. i see it in you, no need to hide it. i accept it, i have accepted it, iknew i'd have to. need not be ashamed, though, we're all hypocrites in our own right. and this is why i don't walk up to you and tear off your faces. i see your human sides. i only wish you had done me the same favor. but again, it's okay, i'm used to it. i am cassandra, never believed, never paid attention to because all i say is "false". the fortune teller is never believed.

Honest Abe

if i'm anything, one thing, i'd like to believe i'm honest. I'm not always blunt, but i'm honest. i can't help it. it's my strong point, it's my downlfall. it's gotten me in trouble, but it's kept me pure. i can stand, with my shoulders down, and my chin held at a middle class position, that i am not a liar. I AM HONEST. i can tell myself when i'm being stupid, i can tell when others are being stupid.
Honesty isn't accepted very well in society; have you noticed?
People get feelings, and get attached to those feelings, and believe they are defined by those feelings, but i see the reasons behind those feelings. i know you do too. but i feel like i'm the only one willing to go there. to go to the heart of the problem. to bring forth the truth lingering in a dusty corner in your conscious. why are we so sensitive? and so afraid to feel by our own will?

he fucked you over? eh, not quite, let's rewind. he's a dick, you knew that when you met him... you liked him becauseee he was a dick... you knew it would end badly...
need i go on?
we as humans are afraid to admit the TRUTH to ourselves, we're afraid of reality. we are our own pyschics, but we'd like to believe OTHERS can change. it's not up to them in your future, it's up to YOU. it's how YOU approacht hte situation, it's IF you approach the situation. We hurt ourselves. and we allows others to hurt themselves. another vicious cycle.
I guess what i'm saying is, it's your choice, if it gets to you, if it bothers you. YOU have the power to say "no, fuck you, i'm stronger than getting upset over you." and i'm not reffering to people,; this theory encompasses everything in life. a tree smashed your car? "fuck you, i'm gonna take the bus." a coworker called you a whore? "fuck you, i know who i am." your mom says, "and that's why you have no friends!"? "fuck you."

ey, i'm honest.

Daily Tarot 10/9

The Two of Chalices card suggests that my power today lies in compromise. I am not alone. I offer and accept love, support, and happiness to connect with the pleasure and beauty of my hearts desire. There are two sides to everything and I don't always have to be right. I am empowered by expression and my gift is attraction.

Hey guys?

What happened?
I think what's driving me crazy is that i DON'T KNOW.
Well, isn't that the theme of the year- not knowing.
Charlie Brown said it best,with an accepting sigh, "good grief"